The echos that remain.

I feel really alone yes, I feel. I have feelings but you wouldn't know because i rarely show them. No need to show something thats going to be shut down when I can keep it to myself to shut down, right? I don't tell people things because you don't care anyway so why waste time when you're just going to be fake back? yea...
My heart aches, my body suffers, and my mind erupts of things that you couldn't grasp with just one hand or an open mind. I don't think you could ever grasp it if you tried. I don't know where all of this comes from but, my insides feel like their disintegrating and soon enough you'll have to bury them along with me. I feel like someone sedated me and took my insides, my heart first leaving only but a drop of blood to keep me breathing for a while and emptied my head of color and left only chaos in black and white. Its getting harder to breathe though, my body is weakening and I am slowly falling apart more and more. I just sit here in the darkness with nothing but the sound of the clocks ticking and my fingers trying to type as fast as I can get the words out. Its getting harder and harder to take a deep breath and as tired as I am and as I get I just can't seem to sleep at night. You would think I would lay down and fall asleep but yet my mind just lays there hopeless trying to run through things over and over but it can't come to a conclusion, making my head unbearable to cope with making me frustrated with everything that I can not handle. The only way I find myself falling asleep is drowning in my tears every night. I wake up in a pool of sorrow on my pillow to find that it finally exhausted me to relax and fall asleep...it gets old after a while. I sit here and I can barely keep my eyes open and I lay down and its like theres a million and two voices in my head, a movie, and a murder scene at the same time.
Well, I guess I'll go start what I need to finish for another time. Goodnight.
♥